Can we relieve our remorse by paying an adequate amount to the dear ones of someone who died a long time ago because of us for a valid reason of self defense?

 

If the death truly occurred as a result of legitimate self-defense, then the answer depends on what you mean by "relieve our remorse."

Morally

Even when a person acts justifiably to protect themselves or others, they may still feel grief, sadness, or remorse that a life was lost. Those feelings are normal and do not necessarily mean they did something wrong.

Paying money to the deceased person's loved ones may be:

• A gesture of compassion.
• A way to acknowledge their loss.
• An attempt to help people who suffered consequences from the event.

But money cannot fully erase the emotional reality of what happened. Remorse is usually addressed through reflection, acceptance, making amends where appropriate, and living according to one's values afterward—not simply through a financial payment.

Legally

The legal consequences vary greatly by country and circumstances.

• In some places, a justified act of self-defense creates no obligation to compensate the deceased's family.
• In others, civil claims or compensation mechanisms may still exist even when criminal liability does not.

Religiously and culturally

Different traditions take different approaches:

• Some emphasize repentance and reconciliation.
• Some encourage compensation or support for affected families.
• Some focus on whether the act was justified rather than on compensation itself.

Psychologically

People sometimes believe:

"If I pay enough, I'll stop feeling guilty."

In reality, guilt and grief often don't work that way. Financial compensation can be meaningful, but it may not resolve the deeper emotional questions:

• Was there any alternative?
• Did I act rightly under the circumstances?
• How do I live with this memory?

Bottom line

If the killing was genuinely necessary self-defense, compensating the deceased person's loved ones may be a compassionate act, but there is no amount of money that automatically removes remorse. Emotional peace usually comes from understanding the circumstances honestly, accepting what could and could not have been avoided, and making whatever amends are genuinely appropriate rather than trying to "buy away" the burden of the event.